Questions
- What do I look forward to by going into in this area with you in dialogue? DIFALD
- WAMFA my attitudes on sex? DIFALD
- WAMFA your attitudes on sex? (Note: these 2 questions require initial discussion to find attitudes, i.e., the belief, principle, judgment or whatever causes your feelings.)
- HDIFA sex in the morning? in the evening? with the lights on? DIFALD
- WAMFA your taking the initiative? DIFALD
- WAMFA taking the initiative? DIFALD
- WAMFA my reaction toward sex? DIFALD
- WAMFA your reaction toward sex? DIFALD
- Have I ever felt used or rejected? WAMFAT
- Have I ever felt inadequate sexually? WAMFAT
- HDIF when I know we are to have sex shortly? WAMFAT
- HDIF immediately after sex? DIFALD
- What words, touches, sounds please me most during sex? WAMFAT
- WAMF when I don’t want sex, but do anyway? DIFALD
- WAMF when you don’t want sex, but do anyway? DIFALD
- Is sex pretty much all or nothing? WAMFAT
- What feelings about sex do I have which I find most difficult to share with you? HDIFAT
- HDIF when you say no? DIFALD
- HDIF when you say yes? DIFALD
- HDIF when you undress in front of me? DIFALD
- HDIF when I undress in front of you? DIFALD
- HDIF when you tell me I’m sexy? DIFALD
- “Our sexual relationship is the expression of our total relationship!” HDTMMF
- HDIF when you kiss me in front of others? In front of children? DIFALD
- HDIF when it’s been a long time since we’ve made love? DIFALD
- HDIF when I feel pressured in our sexual relationship? DIFALD
- HDIF when I ask you to make love? DIFALD
- HDIF when you ask me to make love? DIFALD
- “In sex, I am a gift of God given to you. I am placed in your hands by God.” HDTMMF
- “In sex, you are a gift of God given to me. You are placed in my hands by God.” HDTMMF
- HDIF saying yes for the good of our relationship? DIFALD
- What is the quality I like best in you in our sexual relationship? HDTMMF
- WAMF giving up the right to say no? for a week? for a month? DIFALD
- HDIF when I see you totally open to me in our lovemaking? DIFALD
- HDIF when we make love after an argument or misunderstanding? DIFALD
- HDIF when our lovemaking is interrupted? DIFALD
- HDIF when you compliment me on sex? DIFALD
- Do I see our sex life as a separate part of our relationship? HDTMMF
- Do my attitudes interfere with our sex lives? HDTMMF
- Are there areas in which our sexual relationship could be improved? HDMAMMF (Don’t specify the area!)
- What can I offer you to better our sexual relationship? WAMFAT
- What inhibits me in our sexual relationship? WAMFAT
- HDIF when I’ve been fulfilled by you? DIFALD
- Why do I want to be fulfilled by you? HDMAMMF
- HDIF when there are moods of sadness in our sexual relationship? DIFALD
- Why don’t I trust you with helping me with sex? HDMAMMF
- HDIF knowing that you didn’t trust me in helping you with sex? DIFALD
- HDIF about the lack of wonderment in our sexual relationship? DIFALD
- What does the awkwardness feel like to me when we talk to each other in this area? HDMAMMF
- “All I have is yours. All you have is mine.” What feelings are stirred in me about these words?
- HDIF when you say my name during our lovemaking? DIFALD
- How does the busy-ness of our lives affect our sexual relationship? HDMAMMF
- Do I have the trust to allow me to expose my innermost sexuality to you? HDMAMMF
- In what specific area of my own sexuality have I been reluctant to open up with you? How does revealing this area make me feel?
- HDIF when you lovingly accept a part of me that I had difficulty sharing? DIFALD
- On a scale of 1 to 10, how do I rate our sexual relationship? HDMAMMF
- Do I feel needed by you sexually? HDMAMMF
- What part of my body do I judge to be sexually exciting to you? HDMAMMF
- What part of your body is sexually exciting to me? How does sharing my answer with you MMF?
- Do we have sexual relations often enough? HDMAMMF
- Is it difficult to tell you during our lovemaking what enhances or reduces my pleasure? HDMAMMF
- What specifically do you do to/with me during sex that I enjoy most? HDMAMMF
- What is my attitude about oral sex? HDMAMMF
- What specific experience have we had recently that was most beneficial to our sexual relationship? HDMAMMF
- Do I fantasize during our lovemaking? (YES OR NO) HDMAMMF
- Describe in precise detail your most sensual fantasy. How does sharing this with you MMF?
- Describe the specific instance in which I am most turned on sexually? HDIFAT
- What specific sex act that we have never experienced would I want us to experience? How does sharing my desire with you MMF?
- Is there any form of sex with you that I find repulsive or highly undesirable? If so, what form? HDMAMMF
- Do I fear pregnancy? HDMAMMF
- Have we ever performed sex acts that have left me worried? If so, how does sharing this worry with you now MMF?
- Where would I like to make love with you other than in bed? HDMAMMF
- What specifically do you do to/with me physically that turns me off sexually? How does sharing my answer MMF?
- After sharing this series of dialogues on our sexual relationship, how do I feel about our sexual relationship?
- HDIFA laughing during lovemaking? DIFALD
- HDIFA talking during lovemaking? DIFALD
- Do I believe the things we did to compensate for no sex in our courtship aren’t necessary now? HDIFAMA
- Do I worry about the kids seeing/hearing us? HDIFAT
- Do I have the attitude, “Don’t start something you can’t finish,” and how does that affect our sexual relationship? HDMAMMF
- What sexual baggage am I dealing with? HDMAMMF
- Is sex good or bad? HDMAMMF
- Do I ever use sex as a reward for good behavior? HDMAMMF
- Do I believe that making love after an argument or misunderstanding is an easy way out? HDMAMMF
- Does it matter if we’re meeting the national average? HDIFAT
- Do the kids put a damper on my spontaneity? HDIFAT
- Do I ever worry that if I go all out this time, you will expect this all the time? DIFALD
- HDIF when the kids knock on the door when we are making love? DIFALD
- What makes me feel degraded? HDMAMMF
- HDIF when I have fantasies? DIFALD
- HDIFA negligees? DIFALD
- HDIFA sharing fantasies with you? DIFALD
- HDIF when you compliment me in a way that affirms my femininity / masculinity? DIFALD