Questions

Besides the old stand-by of “What was my strongest feeling today?”, try making one of these your NEW “old stand-by”!

  1. What is my awareness of us as a couple right now? HDIFAMA
  2. What is it like being married to me today? HDIFAMA
  3. What is the most difficult situation facing us as a couple right now? HDIFA this situation?
  4. What stage of relationship do I see us in right now – romance, disillusionment, or joy? HDIFAT
  5. What did I most look forward to today? HDIFSTWY
  6. What is my biggest challenge right now? HDIFSTWY
  7. HDIFA our sexual relationship?
  8. HDIFA our couple prayer?
  9. What do I most need from you today (tomorrow, right now)? HDIFSTWY
  10. What do I think you most need from me today (tomorrow, right now)? HDIFSTWY
  11. What brought me the most fulfillment today? HDIFAMA
  12. What is my dream for tomorrow? HDIFSTWY
  13. What feeling have I not shared with you yet today? DIFALD
  14. How have I encouraged or affirmed you today? How did that feel?
  15. When did I feel closest to you today? HDIFAMA
  16. How did I know you love me today? HDIFSTWY
  17. Please forgive me for . . . . HDMAMMF
  18. What was the center of my life today? HDIFAMA
  19. What is the most vulnerable thing I could share with you today? HDIFSTWY
  20. What do I most need to take responsibility for today? HDIFSTWY
  21. What attitude am I struggling most with today? HDIFSTWY
  22. How was your love life-giving to me today? HDIFAT
  23. In what areas do I feel vulnerable to you? HDMAMMF
  24. Where do I feel the need to be reconciled with you? HDMAMMF
  25. Where do I feel the need to be reconciled with myself? HDMAMMF
  26. What about you am I grateful for today? HDMAMMF?
  27. What do I recall most about our wedding day? DIFALD
  28. WAMFA the line “can’t buy me love”?
  29. What goodness do I see in you today? HDIFTYT
  30. HDIFA waking up beside you? DIFALD
  31. What is my most vivid memory of our honeymoon? HDIFTYT
  32. What will we be doing when we are 80? HDMAMMF
  33. You’re my hero. Describe in full and loving detail. HDMAMMF
  34. What do I most owe you, my beloved? HDMAMMF
  35. What grudges do I hold regarding you? HDMAMMF
  36. What makes it hardest for you to live with me? HDMAMMF
  37. Where do I trust others more than I trust you? HDMAMMF
  38. What would you most like me to change? HDMAMMF
  39. Where do I tip-toe around you? HDMAMMF
  40. When are we most likely to fight and what about? (Is this ever going to change?) HDMAMMF
  41. What tricks do I use to get my way? HDMAMMF
  42. Who controls the mood in the house? HDMAMMF
  43. Who controls the conversation in our house? HDMAMMF
  44. Who controls the bed in our house? HDMAMMF
  45. Where do I most take you for granted? HDMAMMF
  46. Have I been life-giving to you today? HDIFAMA
  47. HDIFA change I see in you? DIFALD
  48. What has been the greatest change in our relationship since our Marriage Encounter Weekend for me? HDIFAMA
  49. What has been the greatest change in our relationship since our wedding day? HDIFAMA
  50. HDIFA “Bloom where you’re planted”? DIFALD
  51. Am I choosing the direction of my life, or is my life directing me? HDMAMMF
  52. When is the last time you forgave me? HDIFAT
  53. When is the last time I forgave you? HDIFAT
  54. Does love mean you never have to say you’re sorry? HDIFAT
  55. HDIF when you ask my forgiveness? HDMAMMF
  56. HDIF when I ask your forgiveness? HDMAMMF
  57. When was a time you touched my life? WAMFAT
  58. When was a time when our love as a couple touched someone else’s life? WAMFAT
  59. HDIFA how we live out our faith? HDMAMMF
  60. How am I life-giving to you? HDIFAT
  61. How does my negative or positive self-image affect me being life-giving? HDMAMMF
  62. HDIFA our hospitality? HDMAMMF
  63. What do I value most about our lifestyle? HDMAMMF
  64. What do I value least about our lifestyle? HDMAMMF
  65. Our lifestyle is a reflection of our values. HDIFA our lifestyle? DIFALD
  66. HDIF knowing that God has entrusted us with something special of Himself? DIFALD
  67. God trusts us to reveal the unique facet of Him that we possess. HDTMMF
  68. What makes us special? HDTMMF
  69. Who are the people who lift me up? HDMAMMF
  70. Where do we go to be lifted up? HDMAMMF
  71. How do we feel when the church lifts us up? DIFALD
  72. How do we affect the marriages of others around us?
  73. HDIFA our lifestyle?
  74. HDIFA taking on a ministry as a couple?
  75. HDIFA the upkeep of our home?
  76. HDIFA splitting of daily chores?
  77. HDIF when we dialogue frequently?
  78. HDIF when we don’t dialogue frequently?
  79. HDIFA how we play together?
  80. HDIF when I hear “Love isn’t love till you give it away”?
  81. Knowing the choice is ours to continue what the weekend started, how do I feel?
  82. HDIFA being part of a sharing group? DIFALD
  83. What is the biggest change our family/friends have seen in us since our weekend? HDIFAMA
  84. There really IS a New World somewhere! HDIFAT
  85. Love is a gift I freely give to you. HDIFAT
  86. What does “being open” mean to me?
  87. What quality in you do I admire most? HDMAMMF
  88. How do you most help me? HDMAMMF
  89. When have I felt the most loved? (this week, this year, ever) DIFALD
  90. What does “trust” mean to me? 14. I think our greatest strength as a couple is . . . . HDIFAT
  91. I think our greatest weakness as a couple is . . . . HDIFAT
  92. What is one thing you do that makes me feel loved? Describe how I feel when that happens.
  93. HDIFA continuing to use dialogue? DIFALD
  94. HDIFA growing old with you? DIFALD
  95. HDIFA the atmosphere in our home?
  96. Dialogue can be a daily date. HDIFAT
  97. Is there anything I am doing by myself that I could involve you in? HDIFA involving you?
  98. Is there anything you are doing by yourself that I would like to be involved in? HDIFAT
  99. We are a sign – what do people see when they see our love? HDMAMMF
  100. HDIF when you criticize me? DIFALD
  101. HDIFA “dating” you? DIFALD
  102. Do I expect security from our marriage? HDMAMMF
  103. Do I expect companionship from our marriage? HDMAMMF
  104. Do I expect tenderness and understanding in our marriage? HDMAMMF
  105. Do I expect encouragement from you? HDMAMMF
  106. Do I expect intellectual closeness from our marriage? HDMAMMF
  107. HDIFA our vacations? DIFALD
  108. What quality of yours do I most admire? HDMAMMF
  109. HDIF when you withdraw into your shell? DIFALD
  110. How do I want you to see me, and is it the same as I want others to see me? HDIFAT
  111. What quality in you am I most dependent on? HDIFAT
  112. What are my feelings about how I accept you? DIFALD
  113. What are my feelings about how you accept me? DIFALD
  114. What do I see in other marriages that I want for us? HDMAMMF
  115. Are we involved with other couples who share our marriage values? HDMAMMF
  116. Is our light under a bushel basket or on a lamp post? HDMAMMF
  117. HDIF when I hear you say something complimentary about me? DIFALD
  118. HDIF when you don’t say anything about something I’ve done? DIFALD
  119. HDIF when we’re too busy for each other? DIFALD
  120. HDIF when I hear you say something derogatory about me? DIFALD
  121. In what areas of our relationship am I still private because I don’t trust you to understand? HDMAMMF
  122. HDIF when you show that you appreciate me? DIFALD
  123. HDIF when you make a sacrifice for me? DIFALD
  124. HDIF when you smile at me? DIFALD
  125. HDIF when I make a mistake and you point it out? DIFALD
  126. HDIF when you interrupt me? DIFALD
  127. HDIF when you ask me to help you? DIFALD
  128. HDIF when you make me laugh? DIFALD
  129. HDIF when I think that you are judging me? DIFALD
  130. HDIF when you are too hard on yourself? DIFALD
  131. Do I think separate nights out is good for our relationship? HDMAMMF
  132. Do I expect us to be involved in mutual activities? HDMAMMF
  133. What guideline for fighting do I find most difficult to practice? HDIFAT
  134. HDIF when I have judged you unfairly? DIFALD
  135. In what area of our relationship am I experiencing loneliness? HDMAMMF
  136. How do I fail to listen to you when I am disillusioned? HDMAMMF
  137. HDIF when you compliment me? DIFALD
  138. HDIF when you do something extra special for me? DIFALD
  139. How does my personality style prevent me from listening to you with my heart? HDMAMMF
  140. How does the image I project affect our dialogue? HDIFAT
  141. How does the image I project affect our relationship? HDIFAT
  142. What has our dialogue done for my self-image? HDIFAT
  143. What was the most significant part of our ME weekend? HDIFAT
  144. How did I feel Friday night of our weekend, and how did I feel Sunday night? DIFALD
  145. What are the positive signs of growth I see in us? HDMAMMF
  146. In what areas do I not listen to you? HDMAMMF
  147. HDIF when we are swamped with responsibility? DIFALD
  148. HDIFA going on a monthly/weekly date? DIFALD
  149. HDIFA our children’s privacy?

Dialogue Acronym Key

DILD: Describe in loving detail.

DIFLD: Describe in full and loving detail.

DMFILD: Describe my feelings in loving detail.

HDIF: How do I feel ….?

HDIFA: How do I feel about …?

HDIFAMA: How do I feel about my answer?

HDIFAT: How do I feel about this/that?

HDIFSTWY: How do I feel sharing this with you?

HDIFTYT: How do I feel telling you this?

HDMAMMF: How does my answer make me feel?

WAMFA: What are my feelings about…?

WAMFAT: What are my feelings about this/that?